make me love you (Charles!)

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He stood and watched as the others trained and worked on controlling their abilities. Erik shook his head and leaned against the fence. Why was he even here? He was so used to working alone. He had been hunting down Sebastian Shaw for so long, and now all of a sudden he was with CIA agents. It didn't make any sense. He should have walked out that night. He had what he needed. So why didn't he?

It was because of him

There was something about the man who saved his life. He had gotten inside his head, in more ways than one. Ever since he pulled him out of the water, Erik hadn't been able to stop thinking about Charles. His plan hadn't changed. He still intended on killing Sebastian Shaw the first chance he got. Charles didn't understand. He had a pair of rose colored glasses on. But Sebastian had taken away the one woman Erik loved, and turned him into this monster. It wasn't the ability that made him this way. It was everything that had been done to him. And no amount of reading his mind could make Charles understand that. And yet, here he was, listening to him, helping him. It didn't make any sense.

He stared at the satellite. It was so far away; he had never controlled something that far away before. And honestly, his power wasn't always that easy to control. He didn't know how to explain it. When he was a boy, he couldn't perform until he was overcame with rage when his mother was shot. He had since then lost his father and sister, all in the Holocaust. Humans weren't to be trusted. That was what he learned from the concentration camps. But Charles Xavier wasn't a regular human. He was a mutant.

you're not alone, Erik. You're not alone. Those words haunted him ever since he met him. How was that supposed to make him feel? Was it supposed to comfort him? Well, it didn't. That only meant that instead of being able to hunt down Shaw, he was stuck with other mutants. Even though he had chosen this. Erik chose to return that night rather than to leave. He chose to watch Charles use Cerebro and help him contact the mutants they found. And why, he would never know.

His arm was outstretched. He strained and glared at the satellite. It wasn't moving. After several seconds, he grew impatient and gave up. "It's no use," he mumbled. And that was how it felt. And he wasn't just talking about the satellite, either. Everything he was feeling, trying not to think about Charles Xavier. It was no use. And that scared of him. Not only was he afraid of caring for someone else, for fear something were to happen, but he was afraid of rejection. Erik put on a front, though, and acted like he didn't care. He was determined to keep it a secret, as long as he didn't know how the other man felt. Of course, that was easier said than done. The man he was falling for was a psychic, after all.

[Sebastian Harris]

An idealist. That's what they could have called him and perhaps, it held a token of truth. He looked at the world in terms of how it should be and the good contained there. A fool would call him naive, however. Charles was fully aware that he could give off that impression and had even used it to his advantage on more than one occasion. His trust might have seemed easily placed, but it wasn't always so. His trust came with a great deal of thought. Erik was someone who he trusted, who he saw good in despite the walls built up around him. There was no regret in saving a life, no matter whose it was. But, he wanted Erik to be a part of his life. He could have left, he knew that. And although he insisted that he didn't, it had been his choice and he had been pleasantly surprised when he stayed to help him. While he was psychic, it didn't mean that he was going to abuse the power to look into Erik; not without permission. His power didn't give him the right to reach into anyone and everyone unless the means justified the ends. He wanted people to be able to trust him. He needed them to.

And for all of the people that he could surround himself with and for as warm as he could be, it didn't change the creeping loneliness that plagued him now and then. There were few that were close to him--truly close. Erik was easily the closest person to him. And he wasn't sure what to say about that or what it meant for him. But, what he did know was that he had possessed his mind. He thought often of him and he worried and cared. It wasn't rare for Charles to care about anyone. He was compassionate by nature, but with Erik, there was a difference and he didn't dare invade his mind to find out if there was anything similar coming from him. He wouldn't do that, even if the sometimes the curiosity welled up inside of him. Instead, he kept his calm, composed self. He didn't think anyone could be wiser to it. The others trained and Charles headed towards the fence, behind his friend. He watched him quietly as he tried to move the satellite, intrigued and under the idea that he really would be able to move it. When it didn't, however, he stepped forward. "You're not focused." He offered, nonjudgmental. "I find true focus lies somewhere between rage and serenity." He wanted to help him. As far as he was concerned, the power that Erik held could very easily be the strongest of any of them. He was capable of more and he didn't doubt that for even a moment. And he didn't think it was only because of how he felt, or because he was starting to fall in ways that he didn't quite understand. It was because it was a fact.

[Deleted]

To say that he wasn't focused wasn't true. He was focused--just not on that satellite. The very sound of his voice made his heart beat faster. Erik looked over at him and scoffed with a shrug. He had to act like this, to avoid falling in love. But wasn't it too late already? His hair, his eyes, that adorable accent. The two men were polar opposites. Charles would always fight for humans, and Erik would always hate them. Charles had never seen the terrors that humans could do. At least, he didn't think he had. And something inside Erik wanted to protect him from ever seeing it. "You don't know what my rage is like," he muttered, and it was true. Charles hadn't seen him pushed to the point of no return like Sebastian had. He had felt it when his mother was murdered, and it was that rage that drove him to hunt down the men responsible for her death and kill them. Erik was sure that if Charles ever saw that side of him, that would be the end of it. With a sigh, he rubbed his hand against his chin before looking at him. Charles sincerely wanted to help him. He could see that, clear as day. But what if he was beyond helping?

"Are you in my head?" the question was asked softly. Honestly, Erik wasn't sure how to take the fact that Charles could not only read his mind, but he could freeze people with his mind and talk to them with his mind as well. Erik had never met another person as powerful as he was. and it left him feeling vulnerable, yet secure at the same time. "Cause, you can. If you wanted." Erik caught himself saying. Why did he say that? He could very well find out about his feelings for him and laugh in his face. Though, he didn't seem to be the type of person who would laugh. Still, what made him think that they could amount to anything? Erik was this monster created by the Russians. He didn't deserve someone like Charles Xavier. Still, he found himself longing for the man to look into his mind, where nobody else could go.