in another life (Tessa)

[Deleted]

He stood in the hallway, energy drink in his hand. He watched her getting settled in, as mothers did. A half, lopsided smile was on his face. He didn't know how he ever let Kari go. A girl as great as Kari--they didn't come every day. How he could have been so heartless, to cut her out like that, he would never understand. But, did it matter anymore? She was here now. He wasn't sure he understood why, but she was. When she needed someone the most, she had turned to him. And it meant the world to Nathan. He loved the idea of taking care of her when she needed it. Though, he would like to know what was wrong. The reckless side of him, the side that allowed him to cheat on Pam so long ago, the side that allowed him to get wasted Danny on occasion, it wanted to go to her husband and beat the answer out of him. But, the responsible side of Nathan, the side that had him taking care of his responsibilities, the side that made him set aside his emotions to care for those he cared about. That side made him wait. There was no sense in going to jail; he couldn't take care of anyone from jail. She would tell him eventually.

"Daddy!"

He looked down at his seven year old, his smile growing upon sight. She had a twinkle in her eyes, and she had a wide, toothless grin. Well, not completely toothless. But, she had lost her first tooth yesterday, and it left a wide gap in her top front teeth. It was cute. "Guess what! Tessa has a bear just like mommy gave me when I was born! And she wants the bottom bunk! And I have to have the top!" Well, she didn't have to have the top bunk. And his strict instructions were to let Tessa choose. Lana had been begging him for bunk beds for months, just so she could sleep high. He had always told her that they had no need for bunk beds. When Kari called, though, he had given his daughter the news that she would be getting them, but she had to let Tessa choose which bunk she wanted. He was glad that it was working out, though. He hadn't wanted to see any fights between the seven year olds.

"That's great, honey. Where is Tessa?"

"in our room." and no sooner had she said that, she was hugging his leg. "Daddy, you're the best daddy in the whole world! No other daddy brings home a mommy and a best friend!"

Nathan chuckled. He had been nervous about the change in the household around Lana. He had no idea how she was going to react, but he figured that he'd deal with it. So, knowing that she was very willing to accept Tessa and Kari made him feel relieved. Hopefully, her sisters would be the same way.

"Hey, listen. Why don't you go tell Neveah to order pizza for dinner? You can pick one out, just for you and Tessa," he made the offer and her eyes lit up.

"okay!!!"

He chuckled as he watched her run down the stairs, calling out her sister's name. Well, that was easy enough. Turning to the room closest to the room he had put her mother, Nathan sighed and slowly went inside the room. Knocking on the door, he smiled softly at the little girl. Man, she had gotten so big. He hadn't seen her since she was a tiny baby. "Tessa?" he said her name, speaking softly so as to not startle her. "You think I can talk to you for a second?" He just wanted to make a couple of things clear to her. It was a talk that he wouldn't even think to avoid. She deserved this.

[Tessa Valley Donovan]

It was strange, being in a new house with people that she did not know. Tessa had to admit, she was a little scare, nervous. She was a pretty shy kid before she got to know others. And she did not understand why her father could not come to. She wanted her daddy so much. And she missed him terribly. She wanted to be back home, not here. She did not want anyone thinking that they could ever replace her daddy. No, no one could. Not ever. That was her daddy. He was her entire world.

After Lana had left the room, Tessa went over and sat down on her bed, hugging her teddy closely to her chest. It was her security blanket. She took the bear everywhere with her. Even to school. She never cared what anyone else thought of her having her bear at school. Hearing the knock, Tessa looked up and saw Nathan standing there. “Uhm—I guess so.” She said in a quiet and shy tone, hugging her bear tighter.

[Deleted]

Nathan looked at this small child. Same age as Lana. He knew how hard this had to be for her. And while it wasn't her fault or her mom's, this wasn't anything that should happen. He also knew that she could be thinking that he was there to replace her dad. And he wouldn't blame her. No, he wasn't going to assign blame or let fingers be pointed. It was important that she was helped to understand that. He needed to do this, and it needed to be today. Right now. So, when he got her permission, he went and sat on the bed beside her.

''Look, I know today was a big change for you. And I want to say that I'm sorry that your dad isn't with you. I want you to know that I care about your mom. That doesn't mean that I want to replace your dad though. No one can and no one should try to. But while you're here, I am going to take good care of both of you. So if there's anything you need, no matter what time it is, I'm just down the hallway. And if you wanna talk or you have any questions, I'm an open book.'' He paused and sighed. ''You're safe here. I promise.'' Sure. Safe. His shed had been used to kill people. He definitely had to find a new house, and fast.