son of a preacher man (Asriel!)

[Deleted]

"What do you mean Tyler's dead?! You were supposed to save him!"

"Sam, I am not a superhero! I did my best! It was obviously God's plan to take him early. Nothing I could ever do could have reversed his plan"

"Don't tell me about God's plan! For almost 20 years now, I have had to sit and listen to you preach about God's plan! And where did it get me? Tyler is gone! My baby! Now you tell me, Mr. Everything-is-God's-plan! What the hell am I supposed to do?!"

"Move on. It's the only thing we can do. I know, Tyler is gone. He was my son too! But we still have Asriel! We have Tracy! And they need us."

"No! I can't just act like he never existed! He was my baby!"

"Was, Sam, Was! I am just as upset as you are! But look around! We still have a family to take care of!"

"You have a family! Tracy isn't even my daughter!"

"SAM! You promised never to hold that over my head!"

"I should have never have stayed with you! This would have never happened!"

"Sam!" Max walked closer to her, and she backed out the front door, into the pouring rain.

"Get away from me! You did this!" she yelled and ran off

"SAM!" He called after her, but she had gotten in her car and drove off. Max heard a whisper, and he turned around, seeing the shadow of two heads behind his chair. "Come on out, Asriel. Tracy, you too."

Tracy stood up slowly "Daddy, you have to follow her."

Max sighed "Tracy, I think she needs some time to cool off."

"No, dad. Something is seriously wrong. I can tell."

"Tracy-"

"Follow her dad! Please!"

Max looked at Tracy, then over at where his son was standing and nodded. "All right. Stay inside, both of you. I'll be back."

It took Max twenty minutes to find his wife. When he did, she was standing at the edge of the bridge. Appalled, Max pulled over and jumped out "Sam! Sam, step down!"

"Tyler needs me!" she screamed at him

"Sam, Tyler is gone. But Asriel and Tracy, they need you. Please, step down."

"No. No I need to be with him!"

"Sam-"

and just like that, she jumped. Max leaned over and reached out for the water "SAM!" tears streamed down his face as he took off his outer shirt and ran to the bank of the river and took a deep breath, diving into the water to save her. The water was rocky from the winds of the storm, and he came out from the water only to dive down again. He found her after five minutes of searching; her head had hit against a rock and even though he pulled her up onto the bank and gave her moutrh-to-mouth, it was no use. She was gone...

Seven months and thirteen days. That was how long it had been since his wife committed suicide. Max hadn't talked about it with either of his children, because he was sure that they blamed him. Not that he could really defend himself; Max blamed himself for Sam's death. He should have been more considerate and gentle when he told her Tyler was gone. He should have stopped her from leaving the house. He should have jumped in after her.

But what would that have accomplished? All that would have done was leave his kids with no parents. Where would they go? Tracy would go to Darcy, he knew. But Asriel? Asriel would have to go to Max's sister, or his parents. His family would be broken up. No, his jumping in after his wife would not have done any good.

The truth was, Max did everything he could. He sat on the ground, holding his wife's body, trying desperately to revive her for hours, even after she was long gone and he knew it was of no use. He had fought a storm finding her body. Max could not have done much more to help her. And yet, he felt like he didn't do enough. For months, he had been living in silent turmoil. And he hadn't exactly helped his children cope.

Max had drowned himself in church responsibilities. The kids could easily get his attention if they were at the Y or in church helping out. Otherwise, sadly, they didn't get much attention at all. Max hadn't realized how neglectful he was being until Tracy, little Tracy, stripped at school. Max still couldn't believe she would do that. Max had to bring himself back from Planet Church and ground her.

Having to discipline his daughter gave Max a wake up call. What was he doing? He still had his children's spirituality to take care of. For seven months, he hadn't even made them go to church. He needed to take care of them, and he needed to start right now. Starting with Asriel, since he was older.

Max had surprised his son by picking him up from school, and had driven him straight to the YMCA. The boy was going to help care for the residents of the homeless shelter, giving haircuts and delivering clothes. And when they were done with that, they were going to cook dinner for them. Max figured it should be an enrichening experience for his son. He handed Asriel the box of clothes while he set up his barber's chair. Glancing over at his son, he gave him a warm smile. Yes, dad was back! Or at least trying to be...

[Asriel Fortuna]

Asriel hadn't been expecting a ride home, though accepted it without argument. Though, at the sight of the car he had given a quizzical raise of his eyebrow. He hardly spoke to his dad on a conversational level. The blonde boy was constantly busy with something else. His personal life was elaborate and kept him occupied most of the time. He was far from a social outcast, if anything a little too easily accepted by everyone that he acquainted himself with. Now, it wasn't that anything else suffered for his social life. Asriel's grades stayed right at above average and he never found himself in any big time trouble. Once in the car, he barely greeted him, more confused about why he wanted to pick him up to begin with. Didn't he have preachy stuff to deal with? Asriel wasn't into the church scene. Some of the sweet little Christian girls maybe... God, they were so naive half of the time. There were a few specific ones (nameless by design) that Asriel could recall how quickly they forgot their little bible teachings and lost their clothes in the basement.

As he walked into the YMCA, carrying the box of clothes, he set it down and wrinkled his nose. "Used clothes? God, I'm glad I'm not them." Asriel mumbled under his breath, crossing his arms over his chest. He wasn't opposed to helping out. It was annoying and he would much rather be hanging out with his friends but he wasn't going to fight it. Asriel couldn't imagine being like those kids. The teenager had to be perfect. His clothes, his hair, his posture... Everything. Asriel had an air of confidence around him. Quick to speak his mind, he was absolutely shameless. It wasn't his fault that not everyone had the same talents and looks that he did. And it wasn't his fault that not everyone was as lucky. The thing about Asriel was that he never showed a different side of his personality. No sadness, no real anger. He had very mild emotions. His anger was often just annoyance and sarcasm, when he was sad, he shrugged it off and even happiness was stifled to a sort of contentment. There was no direct cause for it. Asriel had been that way for a long time. Quite a few years, to be honest. "What time do you think we'll be done?" He asked, running his hand through his hair.

[Deleted]

Max gave a son a look of disbelief. God he was glad he wasn't them? Of course, there were a million reasons to be thankful they were not destitute. Max would hate to think of his children living in a shelter and standing in line at a soup kitchen. Yes, they were very fortunate and should indeed count their blessings. However, the way the boy said it disturbed Max. It said something about the way he thought.

Asriel had an air of conceit about him. It was like he thought he was better than the ones he helped. Max always sought to teach his children that serving the homeless meant more than giving food and clothing. It meant lessening oneself to be below them. Being humble enough to accept one's place in God's service. Max needed to do something, and quick. Asriel would have to learn that he was no better than anyone else.

"Yes, you are very lucky; I'm letting you keep your hair things. But hold off on giving away the boy's stuff just yet. I want you to keep what fits you and donate what you have in your closet. After all, clothes are just as warm used as they are brand new." It was the first thing Max could think of. But it wouldn't be enough, he knew.

"Also, I want you to meet Father Sullivan. He's a new priest over at the Catholic Church. A fine young man. You are going to be assisting him in whatever he assigns you during your spring break that's coming up." After all, spring break was as a good a time as any to help those in need. "And I want you to join the choir at church. Your voice would be such a blessing in amidst all the others."

That should be sufficient, he thought. He wasn't trying to punish the boy. No, he was giving him all these priviledges to help people and be in the choir. He heard the question concerning how late they would be here, and he shrugged "Oh, don't worry. We'll be home early enough to get into bed. After all, the soup kitchen opens at six and I wouldn't want one of the cooks to be falling asleep."

[Asriel Fortuna]

A strange silence settled over the teenager. Oh, he heard every word that his father said and none of them sounded nice. In fact, one specific instruction was mortifying. He wanted him to wear used clothes? That meant giving up his clothes. The clothes that he had painstakingly chose and that suited him best. He looked down at the box, then up at Max, staring at him expressionless momentarily before his brow slowly furrowed. "Excuse me?" He almost choked. Demons from hell might as well have leapt out of the ground beside Max and revelled with a rain dance with the way that the boy was starting to stare at him. "Just as warm, but warm isn't exactly what I'm going for. We have heaters to stay warm." Sure, he would much rather have his clothes tangled with someone else's in a heap on the floor, but Asriel did enjoy his clothes and he wasn't going to take kindly to that. The rest of it didn't sound pleasant either, but it would be easier to swallow if he was allowed to have his clothes.

"Uhm, dad? We're not even Catholic. And don't you usually go to priests to hear about how you're going to spend an eternity burning in hell?" Asriel asked, really not in the mood to go hang out with a devout Catholic priest. That wasn't his only problem though, hearing about choir only made him cringe. "Singing is embarrassing. I don't do embarrassing." He reminded him calmly. Despite his protests, his tone was almost monotonous. It stayed at a quiet and calm level, but at the same time it was incredibly certain. He was fine with helping out if he had to, but Asriel had other plans for his life and none of it involved that kind of activity.

[Deleted]

Max had started to give a young woman a haircut, when he heard the words excuse me. Max looked over at him "Did you not hear me?" But as he went on to talk about warmth and heaters, Max knew he had heard him. "It won't kill you to go six months wearing used clothing, Asriel. You're the only one that would know, unless you tell people. Really, it's not that bad." Max grew up on hand-me-downs. He knew there was nothing wrong with it. He got along just fine wearing used clothes.

Max brushed the girl as he heard his son go on the tangent about Catholics. "Some of them are weirdos, I agree. But not Liam. He's a nice young kid who just wants to do some good. And if he needs the help, then we have no right to deny him help." Max was not going to tell Asriel that he wanted Liam to associate with him to get him back on track. Max couldn't even imagine the response if he told him that.

The Pastor couldn't help but chuckle at his statement about singing. "So learn to not be embarrassed by it. Asriel. Please understand, son. I wasn't asking if you wanted to. I am telling you that you are going to do it. It'll help our relationship. Get some father-son bonding going." Max spoke calmly and gently as he began to cut the woman's hair. If Asriel was baptized, it would be a different story. But as it was, he needed help to get his act together with God. And Max was going to give him help, whether he wanted it or not. It was for his own good.

[Asriel Fortuna]

His father had lost his mind. Sure, used clothing wouldn't kill him necessarily, but it would be a severe beating that his pride had to take. Now, Asriel liked to keep his pride in tip-top shape. He didn't care to have it stomped on or reduced to humility. That was a trait of the weak, and not a trait that he had. He looked at him and it was very clear that Max wasn't making sense to the boy. He was very set in the way that he was and it had been like that for a long time. By now, he wasn't planning on changing and didn't know that he could if he tried. After all, this was nothing that developed after an event or a change he thought about. Asriel was who he was and it hadn't changed. "Well, you forget that I'm the only one that would matter anyway, so that doesn't hold up. It's not about others. It's about me. And yes, it would nearly kill me. They're my clothes. And they are used, technically. I've worn them several times." Asriel replied, just as calmly as before. There was nothing emotional about him. There hadn't been in years. Even after losing his brother and his mother, Asriel hadn't shown much more than mild sadness. He was a little more solemn, but he didn't cry and didn't feel the need to dwell on it. In many areas, he was cold.

The most emotion he showed was fake, and it was used to manipulate. He knew how to get people to do things for him or to want him, and that was when emotion came in handy. Girls ate it up, after all. It wasn't that he was bad, in the least. He never did anything to hurt people. And he would be the first to say that having sex wasn't hurting anyone and that if someone wanted to invest too much into it then that was their problem, not his. "I'm sure there are other Catholics that'd be happy to help." Asriel shrugged, not getting why he wanted him to spend time with a priest. Did he think he was going to somehow see the light? Or was he going to perform an exorcism? Asriel almost laughed at the thought, but didn't bother.

"There are other ways to bond. We could go to a movie, or rent one, or go to a museum." Asriel shrugged. He didn't like to do things that were too active or vocal. It often embarrassed him, and he liked to keep his composure. "I will be embarrassed by it. I don't sing, that's it. I don't." He was being stubborn, even if his voice stayed rather flat. He crossed his arms over his chest, not about to be swayed.

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Max gave his son a blank look. This was harder than he thought. Asriel was not comprehending that he didn't really have a say in the matter. What was matter with kids today? They never listened! Max was never like that, was he? Sure, he might have done a few stupid things, like getting drunk and high and stealing a car and driving it off the bridge. But he never refused to listen to his parents. At the end of the day, it was their say.

Max sighed and scratches his head. He waited until he was done giving the woman a haircut before he turned and made eye contact with his boy. "All right..." he said, but he was not saying it because he was giving in. He was simply contemplating how to handle this. He needed to get the message across to him. He had seen plenty of parents who tried the get-tough approach, the "my way or the highway" tactic. Too many teenagers ended up rebelling and running away when they did that.

Max needed to get to Asriel's level. Getting an idea, he said, "let me try saying this in a way you'll understand what I'm trying to say."He said this very calmly and slowly before clearing his throat. He was about to embarrass himself into the next century, but he didn't mind. It was for his son, after all.

"Yo! Diggety dawg! I don't mean to be all up in your grill, but the G-O-D upstairs needs us to make some sacrifices, dig? You're a hep cat but you're gonna have to change the way you roll. Otherwise you're gonna end up working for your bling cause I ain't gonna be your sugar daddy no more." Translation? Give up your clothes or get a job.

[Asriel Fortuna]

Asriel's emotional range was small, to say the least. Though, the moment that his dad started to talk that way, his eyes widened, completely mortified. What was he doing?! He could speak English, thank you. No one spoke like that! Especially not him and absolutely never was he supposed to hear that come out of his dad. He didn't even know what to say to that. Hell, he wasn't positive he managed to get the message correct. He took a breath, cleared his throat and tried to process, tried not to feel like he wanted to sink into the floor and die right now. "Dad, no." He told him; he didn't want to hear that again. He didn't want to feel that embarrassment rising all over him.

And then as he realized what he suggested, his eyes widened. "Are you telling me to get a job?" He asked, sounding offended just at the prospect. "Why do I have to sacrifice my clothes? They're mine! I didn't do anything wrong." There wasn't a lot that could get Asriel worked up, except for when it came to material possessions. It wasn't too far of a stretch to say that he cared a lot about them and sometimes more than anything else. His clothes and the things he owned mattered.

[Deleted]

"Aha! I knew you'd be able to understand. Maybe I should talk like that more often." It wasn't Max's fault that it had come to this. Asriel was the one who was arguing and refusing to get the point. As his father, Max had a duty to teach him and mold and guide him. Asriel was young, but he wasn't too young to learn a thing or too.

"it's not a punishment, Asriel. You're sixteen. In two more years, you will be graduated and out in the world. You think you'll be able to get clothes from a magical fairy? You need to learn how to manage money, and you need to learn humility and respect. If I don't teach you now, then you might never learn. I'm sorry it took me so long to do this. I know I haven't exactly been attentive since your mom and brother's funeral. But don't worry, son. I'm here now.

As Max finished the haircut and handed Asriel the broom to sweep up, he set his scissors down and reached in his pocket, pulling out a sheet of paper. "I've talked to some businesses for you. There's a tech position at Vampire Studios. The Dot is in need of a dishwasher. And there's a babysitting job with my friend Larisa. All of these have agreed to interview you tomorrow at nine am. So, after we're done at the soup kitchen, I'll be taking you to your choice of interview. And Asriel? You will either choose one, or I'll choose it for you." He meant business. He was going to get through to every last one of his kids, so help him God.

[Asriel Fortuna]

"Yeah, a magical fairy. Let's go with that." Asriel replied, sounding almost bored, but at the same time, annoyed. He didn't want to get a job or to manage money. He could cross that bridge when he got to it. For now, he would much rather hide from it. When he mentioned not being there, he gave a small shrug of his shoulders. "None of you have been, it's not a big deal." He told him and it didn't sound resentful or even upset. If anything, whenever his brother and mother were brought up, he sounded casual and as if it was something that everyone else had to deal with. And for him, it was. He didn't understand how he didn't feel much of anything, but it seemed once they died, he felt even less than he had before. He was completely emotionally detached and he didn't see anything wrong with it. Mostly, he thought about his own pleasure and fun and had logic above emotion.

"Seriously?" He asked, sounding more and more disgruntled and lingering on whiny. "Do you have any idea how much this is going to cut into my life?" He asked, and felt like kicking the floor, but he managed not to hit that level of childishness and managed to fold his arms across his chest, frowning at his dad. "What if those jobs aren't for me?" He asked.

[Deleted]

When he said it wasn't a big deal, Max stopped what he was doing. He set everything down, turned to face his son and put his hands on his shoulders. "Don't you say that, Asriel. It is a big deal. You deserve to have a father who notices and cares about you. You don't deserve a workaholic who buries himself in his work and hides from the world. You're so much better than that." And it took a lot from Max to admit that was what he had been doing. But the man was determined to be honest with himself and accept the truth, even if it was something that highlighted his parenting failures. "I am going to start giving you everything you deserve. And believe me, in the long run, you'll be thankful.

Max didn't want to hear about Asriel's life. "I hate to tell you this, but that's kind of the point. Your life consists of girls and music. And I'm appalled at the thought of what you're doing with the girls. You're going to make some changes, and yes, it will affect the way you live your life. It's supposed to." At the question about the jobs, though, Max frowned. "Reality check, Asriel--everyone starts off doing jobs that isn't them. It's called getting out in the real world. And I think it'll do you some good." He paused, before adding, "Why don't I just choose for you? It will save you some energy trying to argue with me."

[Asriel Fortuna]

Why in God's name was he acting like this was a big deal? He never had any issue with his dad's work habits. If he had been absent, it was nothing that he picked up on. He had his own life too. The rest of them might have been needy and dependent, but Asriel hadn't been. He didn't feel ignored, because as far as he knew, he had always been there. If he needed someone, he would have gone. But, he didn't see himself as needing anyone to help him and hence, he never even looked in that direction. "What are you talking about? You were there. I'm fine. I have been fine. I haven't wanted for anything." So, to give him what he deserved was what he felt he had already been given. He didn't understand what was happening here and it showed on his face in complete confusion. Perhaps the others complained or felt that way, but if they did, then he thought that perhaps they were out of their minds. He never noticed. Asriel was, for the most part, detached.

"I'm doing what they like, that's what I'm doing." He replied, there was nothing to be appalled by. He was having fun and they wanted it. None of the girls he was with said no at any point in time, so he wasn't hurting them. And sure, sometimes he pretended they were special, but it was their own fault they needed to feel that way in order to have sex. Asriel knew how to play the game and at the end, it was good. "Or we can forget the job, I'm okay with that too." He retorted, crossing his arms across his chest. He hated this.

[Deleted]

Max shook his head. "Fine! Maybe it doesn't matter to you that you might as well have had a crack addict or-or-or an alcoholic for a father! But it matters to me! I promised myself the day Tyler was born that I would never do this! I told myself that I wasn't going to be a dad who buried himself in everything else and ignore his family! God, and then the second things go wrong, I hide and do exactly that! Not to mention that all of this shit was my fault to begin with! You were there, Asriel! I'm sure you heard what I said to her!" he didn't even realize he was yelling, let alone cussing, until he neared the end of his rant. He looked around, his gaze locking with the young girl that he was in the middle of trimming her hair, and at her mother, who was glaring at him for his use of fowl language in front of her daughter. And all at once, he dropped the scissors and the comb.

"I can't do this. I can't. You should have left me in the hospital. What was I thinking? I could never be a father. Not without Sam. You'd be better off without me." he shook his head and stepped out into the hallway, flagging down one of his volunteers so that he could cut the girl's hair instead. He was ready to have another melt down. And he definitely didn't want to do it in front of the people he was supposed to be helping or his son.